How To Not Expect Anything
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To not expect anything, you must first look inward. Expectations usually come from past experiences. These experiences can come from what has been expected of you in the past or what you think is normal to expect of others.
These expectations can often be tainted, however. For example, if toxic expectations were held for you, you might do the same for others without realizing it, making these expectations harmful.
Not all expectations are bad, and getting rid of them may not be the best idea. Keep reading to discover how to get rid of your expectations and why some are good.
Is it Possible to Have no Expectations?
No, it is not possible to train yourself to have no expectations. Expectations are a natural thing to have as a human being. Expectations often protect us from being harmed or used by other people. Having no expectations is not possible, even if you want it to be.
You expect things from everyone, from the barista who you expect to make your coffee or your partner, who you expect to treat you with kindness. Expectations protect us in most scenarios.
However, training yourself to have fewer expectations that are toxic or beyond reality is possible. You can do this by focusing on yourself inwardly and exploring what is rational to expect versus not.
What do you Call a Person with No Expectations?
A person with no expectations is called either detached or altruistic. It depends on where the person is emotionally and mentally in this journey.
People with absolutely no expectations are often detached from life and emotionally uninvested. However, people who have removed themselves from toxic expectations alone are known as altruistic.
This is when a person does things for others out of kindness rather than holding toxic expectations. These toxic expectations usually mean expecting something in return any time you do something for someone else, no matter how simple.
Are Expectations Toxic?
Yes, expectations can be toxic. While most expectations are usually rational ones, sometimes expectations can come from an emotional and harmful place.
Toxic expectations are usually the ones we expect without ever communicating about them. This can include things like expecting your friend to bring you food when they go out and expecting your partner to comfort you exactly as needed.
While you may think these are normal expectations, oftentimes, you are holding others to a higher standard than you should. Not everyone is going to figure out what you need or want at that moment.
Communicating is always the best way to go in these situations if you want something. Expectations beyond the basics like kindness and respect are toxic just because it’s not realistic to believe someone should know what you want without prior communication.
Is it Always Good Not to Expect Anything?
It is not always good to have no expectations. Expectations, as mentioned, are a natural part of the human experience. Everyone expects things from others all the time, and this is natural. It is normal to expect basic kindness and respect from others, especially loved ones.
Not expecting anything often leads to being detached. Having no expectations usually leads to having no emotional attachment to things. It can also be harmful to yourself as well as others.
You cannot protect yourself from harmful things if you never expect them to be good. You can harm others if you never hold yourself to any expectations, even if those expectations fluctuate.
How Long Does it Take to Learn it?
Reducing your toxic expectations is a lifelong journey. For this journey, you must first work on yourself and look internally. Then, find the source of these toxic expectations and work through them.
Toxic expectations are usually the result of past issues you allow to fester. However, they can also come from a person placing their expectations for themselves on someone else when there is no reason to.
In this internal work, you must heal emotionally and mentally. You have to be vigilant and watch out for those toxic expectations you may have for yourself or others.
Final Thoughts on How To Not Expect Anything
Expectations can seem like a bad thing because they can often lead to someone being hurt emotionally or mentally. However, that is what expectations are there for. Expectations are meant to protect you from further harm by setting the bar for what you need.
Your past can taint expectations and your fear, though. To get rid of these toxic expectations, work on yourself and begin to heal. While expectations can be scary, you should not get rid of all of them and risk becoming detached.