How To Tell Yourself Everything Will Be Okay?
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Life gets the best of everyone. You may have important exams coming up, feel stuck in your life, or have faced a series of hard times. In those moments when anxiety, fear, and hopelessness have the best of you, it can be hard to see a brighter future.
Some people have ways to help themselves cope. For example, they may believe in a higher power that guides their path or that everything happens for a reason.
However, these methods may seem weak or fake for those who don’t believe in fate, destiny, or someone controlling their path.
There is hope for those who don’t believe in these and believe that sometimes, bad things happen. But, unfortunately, it takes a little more work and can take longer to get to that point.
However, you can do it. All you have to do is reframe your mind and think about the positives. This often starts simple, like just telling yourself everything will be okay or reciting your goals for your new and better future.
How Often Should You Say it?
Honestly, there is no limit. Say it to yourself as often as you need to get through the day or even the hour.
Whenever you feel yourself having negative thoughts and getting overwhelmed by your situation, you should say it.
Additionally, if a panic or anxiety attack is starting to build, or has already hit, saying that everything will be okay can help to bring you back down and ground you.
Try saying it in different ways if one way doesn’t seem to work. Don’t just repeat it in your head, but say it out loud. Maybe even shout it. There is no limit to how often you can say it.
Additionally, try saying it in actions rather than words. For example, get up and try to clean your home, or make an effort towards fixing the problem however you can. If that is taking a break, reading a book, or making your favorite drink and just zoning out, do that too.
Look for the positives as well. Sometimes, everything in your life may seem negative, but that is very unlikely. For example, is there a good smell on your way to work? Do you always see the same dog roaming around in the streets? Maybe you are close to your end goal.
Try to tell yourself things will be okay, focus on the positives, and do something that will make you feel better. Do this as often as you need. It may be a lot at first, but as you get better at thinking positively, it will get easier and occur less often.
How Can You Know if it’s Working?
Eventually, you will get to the point where you automatically tell yourself everything will be okay. Then, your brain will take the situation you’re in and reframe it so you think positively about the future or ways you can fix the current issue.
However, that takes a while, and in the meantime, it may not feel like it is working. However, there are small signs. Perhaps you have fewer anxiety attacks during the day, or they are calming down quicker. Maybe you can now see some positives about your life.
The change happens slowly, and you may not notice it as the change occurs. But if you stop and look back at how you were when you started, you may realize that there has been a difference after all.
You must realize that it takes time. Change isn’t going to happen on the first day or even the first week. It can take months before you notice things getting better or working.
When is the Right Time to Do it?
Doing it all the time will do nothing but make the statement seem fake or like you are just uttering words. For it to have meaning, you need to say it when you need it the most.
When you are feeling down, scared, sad, or anxious, and you feel like there isn’t any hope or that things aren’t going to be okay, you need to say it. But don’t just say it when you are slightly upset or worried, or it won’t have the same impact.
However, besides that, there are no particulars. You can say it in the middle of the night when sleep is avoiding you, when you first get up in the morning, or even in the middle of your job when you feel stuck and like life is just the same day on repeat.
What Different Ways are there to Say it?
There are many different ways to say it. You can make general statements, specific ones to your situation, compare your life to others that have it worse, or even create a plan to help things be okay.
Some examples of general statements you can use are:
- I can do this
- I can handle anything
- I don’t have to assume the worst
- I don’t have to believe in my anxious thoughts
- I can be scared or anxious and still move forward
- I did this last year, and I can do it again
- I can ask for help
- I have the time to do this
- I only have to get 1% better every day, and it isn’t all or nothing
- I may be embarrassed now, but the feeling doesn’t last forever
- I can let my anxious thoughts go
You can start off using these exact statements. Then, as you get better at noticing your thoughts and when your anxiety is creeping in, you can work on tailoring your statements to your situation.
For example, if you don’t know how to do a certain homework problem, you may initially get overwhelmed, feel like a failure, or even feel stupid. However, now you know how important these statements are.
You can tailor your thoughts to be something along the lines of, “these are my anxious thoughts. I’m not the only one feeling this way, and I can use tools like the internet, a tutor, my teacher, or my peers to help me with this.”
It takes time and isn’t easy, but it is entirely possible to do.
How Can You Confront Your Inner Critic?
The first step to confronting your inner critic is realizing when you are being a critic. If you aren’t aware when you are having these thoughts or putting yourself down, you can’t change anything.
Try meditating a few times. Meditating, especially guided meditation, is focused on helping you watch your thoughts and learning to note when your thoughts are heading in a particular direction or drifting.
Once you become aware of when your thoughts are drifting to become more negative or critical, you can practice changing your thoughts.
For example, talk to yourself like you would a friend with the same problem, or think about the worst-case scenario realistically instead of being plagued by doubts.
Change your negative thoughts to good ones. For example, instead of saying you can’t do something, maybe think that you can do it, but you might need more practice first or that you can at least put in your best effort.
Final Thoughts on How To Tell Yourself Everything Will Be Okay
It isn’t easy to change our mindset. We can be harming our own lives, making our situation worse with our negative and anxious thoughts, and not even realizing what we are doing. So taking the time to pay attention to ourselves and our thoughts is very important.
It can help us to realize when we are letting our doubts and fears win and allow us to change them. Just by changing our thoughts, we can change a lot about our life.
With your mind in the right place, you will be surprised by what changes for you. However, you can’t expect it to be fixed right away. Changing your mindset takes a lot of work, and it is a slow change you may not even be aware of.