My Heart Will Never Heal
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Have you recently experienced heartbreak? Perhaps you’ve broken up with a long-term significant other, or maybe a beloved family member has recently passed away. Whatever the reason, take a moment to recognize that your experience is valid and real.
Each time we grieve can be unique, and we all process these times differently from each other. Even so, there are a multitude of things you can try to help you find solace in your new everyday life.
Keep reading as we aim to guide you along your journey of grief and, hopefully, recovery.
Is this Feeling Just Temporary?
No one, including yourself, can tell you how long it will take for you to come to terms with your loss. You have to give yourself permission to fully grieve and ample time to do it.
Just because someone else has experienced something similar and got over it within a month doesn’t mean that you should be able to do the same. To begin healing, you don’t need to let go and forget the past entirely.
It is worth noting, however, just like the ancient Persian adage goes – “this too shall pass.”
You can interpret this and despair that nothing ever lasts, or you can decide to release yourself and take comfort, knowing that even the worst of the worst eventually becomes a distant memory.
How To Heal the Right Way?
There isn’t necessarily a right or a wrong way to heal during this process. If you already know what things make you feel better while you grieve, you can lean on those. That being said, some of the best practices you can employ to help you heal may include:
- Seeking professional help from a grief counselor or therapist.
- Connect with your friends and family or others who may be going through the same thing you are – they aren’t a replacement for therapy but speaking about your feelings is vital.
- Take care of yourself by eating well and getting some exercise – if you eat junk and gain weight or experience acne outbreaks, you’ll probably just feel worse.
- Reflect on the joys in your life, even the most minor ones, during your grieving.
How Long Does it Take to Heal?
There is no time limit to your grieving. Even though jobs may only give you so much time off during this difficult time, that doesn’t mean you have to go back to the way things were as soon as they stop paying for your time off.
You can take extra unpaid time off if your financial situation allows; if not, you don’t have to act like everything is fine while at work – you just need to be able to perform your duties. Depending on what has happened, it could take you weeks, months, or even years to heal.
Some people carry heavy burdens of grief for a lifetime but have adapted to live with these burdens. As we said earlier, you don’t need to wipe everything clean and start over, and you just need to come to an understanding of the events on your terms.
Things You Should Do in Order to Heal
Remember that everyone reacts to stressful and difficult situations differently, so the process of healing is different for everyone too. Below is a list of ideas that could help you as you figure out what’s next:
- Spend some time in the great outdoors – losing yourself in nature has mental and physical benefits that you can take advantage of even when you’re not grieving.
- Take some time to contemplate your feelings and then write them down – you can organize your thoughts and lighten the emotional load by physically writing how you feel with pen and paper
- Stay connected – isolating yourself is a fairly natural reaction to these kinds of situations since you feel that no one else understands, but you should meet and communicate with others to keep yourself from bottling everything up.
What Should You Not Do if You’re Trying to Heal?
While everyone might have different ways or things that aid in the healing process of a broken heart, the list of things that you shouldn’t do as you try to heal is very similar in the majority of cases:
- Avoid consuming alcohol in any amount, but especially large quantities – it’s very unlikely that drinking to “forget” will actually help you do so, and you would likely regret losing that part of you.
- Avoid using drugs – in a similar vein to alcohol consumption, you should avoid using drugs even if they help at the moment because you may become dependent on them or feel you need them to experience happiness.
- Don’t rush your healing as it can end up extending the process or deepen the wounds and make them more painful.
Final Thoughts on Dealing with Heartbreak
Heartbreak, for any reason, is one of life’s greatest sorrows and can be an experience to grow from or something that utterly breaks you down.
Of course, the healing process is different for everyone, but remembering that it isn’t a race will help you fully accept what happened.
Remember to take plenty of time and then some more as you move through the five stages of grief and reach out to others during your time of need.